Friday, August 21, 2009

Why Yes, I am a Scaredy Cat!

Lately? I've realized that I'm scared of... pretty much everything.

Some examples? I'm afraid of being mauled by a bear. Not only when I'm hiking through the wilderness of the UP, but when I'm walking down my street.

That's some scary shit.

I'm afraid of being blown off bridges when it's windy. Especially when I'm driving and my car gets all swerve-y because the wind is blowing THAT hard. And there's no way in hell I walk across bridges when it's windy. Duh.

I'm afraid of hitting a deer when I'm driving. I clench the wheel and frantically try to look FUCKING EVERYWHERE for deer whenever I pass a forest or a field or a farm or... you know... anywhere.

I'm afraid of DB's 14-year-old dog. I avoided his house for so long, his parents really thought I hated them. When I finally started visiting again, I only entered/exited through the basement, where his killer attack dog never ventures.

I'm extremely afraid of knives. Even butter knives and plastic knives. Point anything resembling a knife at me and I'll RUN to the other side of the room. Literally. DB thinks it's hilarious and loves to tease me with butter knives.

See? There's a fucking butter knife in his head.

I'm afraid of BIG ants. Not the little guys or the medium-sized buggers, but the huge fuckers with the fat bodies. They give me the heebie-jeebies almost as much as centipedes do.

Enough explanations. I'm afraid of bad weather. I'm afraid of driving in the snow. I'm afraid of losing my hearing. I'm afraid of birds pecking my eyes out. I'm afraid of being attacked by killer machines from outer space. I'm afraid of being stalked. I'm afraid of getting cancer from the microwave. I'm afraid of ferrets. I'm afraid of being home alone. I'm afraid of death. I'm afraid of getting cancer from my cell phone. I'm afraid of aliens. I'm afraid of public speaking. I'm afraid of rejection. I'm afraid of killer diseases. Oh, and I'm TERRIFIED of brittle stars.

OH GOD!!!! EW!!!!

*Ahem* In other news...

Song of the Day: Carry You Home by James Blunt
What are you afraid of???

p.s. Have a beautiful weekend!


Ave said...

These are really scary pictures :S

Camille said...

I share the bridge fear, except I fear the bridge will collapse while I'm driving across it regardless of how big or small it is.

That one goes with the spiders, failure, heights, large bodies of water, etc.

But, everyone's afraid of something. *shrug*

Lucy said...

I'm afraid something bad will happen to my children. You would think that now that they are older I would not be as worried, wrong, still paranoid.

Wonderful said...

I'm afraid of locking my keys in my car. Oh wait, I just did that. FML.

Actually, I'm really terrified of snakes, because one time a garner one chased after me in our backyard when I was little. I ended up killing it with a brick, but it totally deserved it.

Jill Pilgrim said...

Dude, I am a giant scaredy cat. Like air? It scares me.

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

I'm afraid of deer too. So pretty but scary all the same.

Jamie said...

Oh gosh. I'm the same way. I'm scared every time I stop my car someone will rear end me. I run away from bees. Im afraid of walking alone. I could go on and on.