Relax & Take it Easy...It's Friday!

Let me apologize for disappearing on you guys. I forgot to mention that I was heading up north for a few days. Sans Internet.

I cross-my-heart-hope-to-die-stick-a-needle-in-my-eye-(ew) that it will never happen again. Maybe.

But, hey, guess what? I had an amazing time up north. For the first time in a long time, I surrounded myself with family and nature; two things I now realize I don't spend enough time around.

(my bloggy feet relaxing by the lake)
We played cards every night. I won every time. We went for walks and kayak rides and sat around the campfire at night. We made a mess out of ourselves while attempting to make smores.

(my bloggy feet on a dock)

We spent too much time together. We got sun burnt. We weren't used to being together and got annoyed easily. We got mosquito bites. We fought over trivial things. We got stung by bees. We wandered through the woods alone when we needed to.

(My bloggy thumb says 'thumbs up!')

At three in the morning I sat by the lake and watched the stars. I didn't find any constellations. I saw a firefly get caught in the reeds and light up our beach. I smoked and drank and laughed. I kayaked slowly around the lake, watching every creature that caught my eye. Dragonflies followed me. I became entranced by three giant turtles and a family of swans.

(My bloggy legs enjoy kayaking)

The verdict? I had a wonderful week. I'm sad that it's over. I can't wait to go up north again. What about you? What've you been up to while I was away? I'd love to listen...

p.s. HAPPY FRIDAY, BITCHES!!!

Meet the Double Ds

I have two new roomates. Observe:
Guinea pigs!! The black/brown one is names Daffy and the mostly-white one is named Daisy. Hence 'The Double Ds'. Clever, I know.

Tell me what you think about them. DB thought they were creepy when he first met the lil guys. Maybe you have to be a rodent person? You tell me.

Instead of Going to Work...

Job #2 has never been very good to me.

I've worked there longer than almost-everybody and I'm still getting less pay and less hours than other employees. A girl that's worked there half the time I have just got a big promotion. Even after I told my hot manager that I was planning on staying throughout the fall. I've always dealt with this and let the managers walk all over me. Until yesterday.

I was on call for 4 pm. Basically this means that I have to keep an open schedule until 2 pm, at which point I call in and find out whether or not they want me to work. Yesterday I had accidentally gotten myself scheduled to work at Job #1 as well, so I was hoping I didn't have to go in.

At 9fucking30 in the morning (read: very early for me), Job #2 calls. Wondering if I can come in immediately. My manager: "You may or may not work until 4. We can't make any guarantees." Translated: "Somebody else didn't show up so we're going to trick you into working your shift and theirs".

I lazed about in bed wondering whether or not to call them back. I already had plans with DB for the morning. And plans at night if you call working another job a 'plan'. I was pretty tired. Literally sleepy and tired of being treated like shit.

Can you guess what I did?

I turned off my phone, rolled over and went back to sleep. I woke up at noon and spent an hour reading TMI Thursday posts. I compulsively bought iTunes songs. I went out to eat with DB and then went to the pet store. I had a blast working with my sister. I smoked. I laughed until my stomach hurt. I went out to eat again. I made the most out of a perfect day.

Fuck you, Job #2.

TMI Thursday: What Have I Done?!?

It's TMI Thursday, bitches!! Hosted by the lovely LiLu, as always. Enjoy...

So. DB and I were texting yesterday. We were discussing our relationship problems. Meh.

DB: It's not fair that you get to do what you want [drugs] and I don't get to do what I want [buttsex]!

Tay: Lol. Fine. But only if you smoke with me.

Tay: (haha)

DB: Ooh, she drives a hard bargain. I guess I have no choice but to agree!

DB: (haha)

Tay: What, really? I'm so excited!

DB: What? Yesterday you told me you'd rather eat a live mouse than have buttsex.

Tay: ...

(it's true)

Wordless Wednesday: DB edition

(click button above to see more WW posts over at 5 Minutes for Mom)

p.s. - My heart hurts because I didn't get many comments yesterday. I still need advice so if you'd like to visit yesterday's post... click here!

Love Stinks

My relationship with DB is deteriorating.

He doesn't approve of my recent activities (read: smoking) and he hates my friends. Seriously. He told me so.

I hate this. I want him to smoke with me. I want him to like my friends. I don't want to be forced to split up my time to accommodate everybody. I'm always letting somebody down. If he didn't hate them we could ALL hang out allthefuckingtime.

They all love him, by the way.

I don't know what to do. The situation is seriously starting to wear on us and it's time to stop ignoring the problem. Is it finally time for DB and I to take a break from the relationship? You guys know I've been thinking about taking a break for a while (CN anybody??). The difference between then and now? I actually have a real problem on my hands now.

Nothing too serious of course. And DB is more than happy to sacrifice his happiness to stay with me.

But what I'm doing makes him miserable. He hates it. It makes him sick. Why does he still want to be with me? I don't understand.

Love.

I really don't want to quit smoking. For once in my life I've found friends that I really enjoy spending time with. And a lot of our time spent together is spent smoking. Go ahead and judge, haters. We're getting so close and it means a lot to me, especially after Marinegirl left.

So what do I do?

Things to consider:
1) He would consider this "breaking up"
2) "breaking up" would probably break his heart
3) No more UP trip

Anybody have advice for this troubled chica? Pweease? I need help.

I Ramble on Mondays (2)

It's kind of like Friday Fragments, except I'm just ramblin' on and on about my weekend. After all, did you really expect a REAL post on a Monday?!? Really.

The Dealer threw a fantastic party at his place last night. I finally got to meet his potential girlfriend, there were so many people there that I haven't talked to in a while, everybody was happy and chill and...I don't know. It was just real fun.

I met a guy there last night, we'll name him The Drunk, who was pretty fun to talk to. Later that night I found out that he tried to drive home from the party, hit a trash can, got pulled over, and went to jail. Holy shit.

I gave Guitarguy a hug for the first time last night. I'm one of those weird girls that loves-loves hugs.

DB wants to talk. Dun dun dunnn. I don't know about what and I was pretty drunk when he was trying to explain over texting:

Tay: I love u.

DB: I really want 2 talk. Love u 2

Tay: Damn nothing wrong right? Im sry about earlier :/ *referring to a minor fight*

DB: Theres some issues...I accept ur apology :* im sry too

Tay: Phlease dont be mad.

DB: Im not mad. I dont get mad remember? Just sad. Very very sad.

Tay: Theres nothing wrong with this :( ur making me nervous about talking

DB: There's nothing wrong with what? And dont b nervous i just have a buildup of things i need 2 let out

Tay: K but if u blow up about this imma be upset.

DB: Not 2 b rude but u cant tell what i cant do. And if theres gonna b any blow up itll b water not fire. But i wont :] i love u so goddamn much taylor

Tay: i love u so goddamn much too :) thats why im worried about this

DB: Why r u worried? I just really need 2 say some things that have been inside me. Its like trying 2 hold on 2 a ball of needles. Dont worry therell b no br8kup

Tay: ok good. Imma go now tho. Love uuu.

DB: I loooooooooovvee uuu 2 sweetie. Text me when u get the chance

Did I tell you that LipRing has a girlfriend? Well, he does. I'm not even that upset either. It'd be easier to hate her if 1) she wasn't awesome 2) I didn't have a boyfriend and 3) if LipRing knew I like him. I'm supposed to be getting ready to go have lunch with them (and Redhead and the Cheffess and some other guy) right now.

I'd love to hear about your weekends if you feel like ramblin'.

A Fragment-y Friday

Guess what, lovers? It's a beautiful Friday! And y'all surely know what that means. It's time for Taylor's version of Friday Fragments, hosted by the lovely Mrs4444 at Half-Past Kissin' Time.

*DB and I almost-almost had sex in the woods yesterday. We were walking all horny-like through the woods when suddenly...

Yep. A hungry swarm of mosquitoes attacked us. So, yeah, no sex in the woods for me. Damn.

*The Cheffess, Redhead, and the Dealer finally got back from camping. I hung out with the three of them last night and, of course, I can't wait to again! I love my friends.

*DB and I are planning a trip to the UP of Michigan that I'm really excited about. I love traveling and nothing sounds more appealing than a long road trip with the one person I truly love. *sigh* I'm so excited!!

--
If you want to be as cool as me, you'll listen to Love Stinks by The J. Geils Band. It's my song of the day!
--

Happy weekend, darlings.

TMI Thursday: This is why I don't give road head

As LiLu says... ***Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!***

This isn't about me.

I remember my first kiss, the first time I got to second base, my first bj, and yes, my first time having sex.

But enough about sex, this post is about blow jobs!

My dear sister's first blow job was awesome. At least it was awesome for me, because I laughed so hard when she told me about it, I almost peed my pants. Ew.

Not so awesome for her.

Sis was sort-of-dating this guy, Filmguy. He liked to film things. Anyways. They were driving around our neighborhood killing time, because there's seriously nothing better to do in this town when you're 16.

Cue the blow job.

Tay: While he was driving? Like road head?
Sis: Not exactly...

Turns out that he parked his car in the middle of the road and let her take over.

Blah, blah, blah, head, head, head.

And somebody knocks on the window.

Filmguy rolls down the window, junk hanging out, Sis in his lap, and asks "what?!?!" As if there was nothing wrong with what they were doing. Some old guy was standing there.

Old guy: I think you two should get going now.

Tay: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh my god, you got caught? Hahahahaha.
Sis: It gets worse.
Tay: Can it possibly?
Sis: We were parked right down the street. Like, right-right down the street. I'm pretty sure that old guy was our neighbor.

And from then on, Sis avoided our neighbor, I cracked up whenever I saw him, and poor Filmguy never got another blow job from her.

Happy TMI Thursday!

Boyfriends

My first boyfriend's name was Curtis. Real name, by the way. I called myself his girlfriend for four years. Longest relationship I'd had so far. We met when he was five and I was six. The boys in my kindergarten class used to chase me around during recess, threatening to turn me into 'dead meat' if they caught me. Curtis would always save me.

My second boyfriend was CN. We didn't know each other very well when we first met. He was a middle school 'player', with a different girlfriend every week. I still don't know why that appealed to me. I was thirteen and he was twelve when we met. He was immature and liked to swear and talk about sex. I was simply shy. We lasted a short two months.

My third boyfriend was DB. I was attracted to his humorous personality and popularity. Everybody loved DB. He was seventeen and I was sixteen when we met. We discovered how alike we were after we started dating. We shared a love for music, a love for writing, a love for the outdoors, a love for conservation and the environment, a love for each other.

We broke up once, I thought CN was still in love with me again. Turns out he wasn't, or maybe he was, I'll never know. I got back together with DB too fast to find out.

We never fought until I started drinking and smoking with the Cheffess. I'm having so much fun with my new friends and hobbies and he refuses to take part in them with me. Is it wrong of me to want him to? I don't know how much longer we'll last.

Tell me about your boyfriends.

I Ramble on Mondays

This morning I took the coldest shower of my life. I had the cold water completely shut off and I was still goosebumping.

I didn't have time to shave my legs because I had to get to work. I stayed out too late again last night. 430AM last night, 4 the night before. I've never been more tired in my life.

At 4AM last night (this morning?), I realized this guy was crawling in my bed:

It took me 15 minutes to get him out of my room. I didn't kill him, I couldn't.

The only thing I've eaten today is a bag of Cheetos. It's almost 130PM. I need to eat/drink healthier. I've had a large McDonalds coke everyday for the last week. My teeth are going to fall out.

I haven't smoked since Friday. I want to tonight but I don't think I can/should. I'm working all day and won't be able to eat very much; last time I smoked without eating I almost passed out.

The Cheffess is camping with her new boy toy and the Dealer. I wish I was with them.

My dad keeps coming up in conversation. DB asked whether or not I wonder when he's coming home. I told him I don't think about it. He asked why. I didn't answer. I didn't want to cry in front of him; I don't expect to see dad again.

Last week Aaron and I got drunk together. He told me about his dad's suicide. I told him I don't speak to my father anymore. He shook his head and told me I'm going to regret it when he's gone.

I don't know what I think about that.

I can and I will

Hello, friends. You should go check out Jenn's blog today, because I stole this meme from her. Kudos and much love, Jenn!

I can't...
-Golf with DB without getting angry
-Tan without burning or freckling
-Do the stanky legg
-French braid

I can...
-Play Crazy Train on the guitar (besides the solo)
-Distinguish between different whale species
-Ride a bike without using the handlebars
-Sing the entire RENT Broadway from memory

I won't...
-Live in this state forever
-Give up on my sister
-Eat anything at McDonalds besides the chicken nuggets
-Lose my ipod again

I will...
-Travel with DB this summer
-Get a tattoo
-Complete my summer to-do list
-Continue blogging

I shouldn't...
-Worry about my future
-Ignore texts from people I don't want to talk to
-Sleep until noon
-Eat cake for breakfast
-Lose track of old friends

I should...
-Be more honest with DB
-Play the piano everyday
-Take better care of my garden
-Visit my grandma more often
-Listen to more classic rock

Apparently ipods and alcohol don't mix well

Here's what I remember about Friday night:

Fun.

I realized it was missing when I woke up Saturday morning afternoon. My beautiful, brand-spankin-new 16G orange ipod. A very expensive gift from DB.

Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit.

I searched the party hostess' house. FAIL.
I searched my car. FAIL.
I searched her car. FAIL.
I asked everybody who was still there. FAIL.
I even facebooked it:

Taylor has lost her ipod. It's orange. Anybody? FAIL.

I proceeded to freak the fuck out.

Before fireworks on Saturday, I searched my house/room/pants/everywhere.

Yep, you guessed it. FAIL.

On Sunday I went to Best Buy and bought another brand-spankin-new 16G orange ipod. DB thinks I found it.

A $230 gift to myself.

The party was totally worth it though.

I love Fridays too

I know I complain a lot on this blog, but I'm not really an angry person. I'm incredibly happy with my life. My friends are amazing, I have DB, I'm healthy, I'm loved. Everything always seems to fall into place.

I read an amazing post by Courtney this morning. After reading it, I was feeling quite happy and motivated and full-of-love. I felt like blogging about it. Unfortunately, I don't have a way with words like Courtney. My mind went blank.

Then I read Jenn's post about love. I've decided to copy her idea (and give her credit for it - see link above - you should go read her list and then follow her blog - it's fantastic) and write out my very own love list.

Here goes.

Walking through the woods after its rained. Spending all morning in bed on the computer. Making people laugh when I don't mean to. Inspirational music. Making people laugh when I mean to. Receiving a phone call. Listening to music until I fall asleep. Learning a new song on the guitar. Coke. Victoria's Secret.

Breezy mornings. Finding crabs on the beach. Watching fireflies. New friends. People who have strong opinions. Participating in debates. Crushes. Singing in the car. The feeling I get after I exercise. Random compliments. When people remember the conversations they've had with me. Lazy Sundays. Going out on Saturdays.

Having a clean room. Burning incense. Brushing my teeth. Reading blogs. Dreams. My sister. The conversation I had last night with my Grandma. The pictures of Grandpa as a firefighter. When my mom talks about my dad without getting angry. Artists. Postcards. Friend requests on facebook. Sunlight. When people know my name.

Life.

Yes, I am a Material Girl

I've bought/been given a lot of new things lately.

Such as, you ask?

DB bought me a brand-spankin-new 16G orange iPod nano...
And an iTrip...

I had to buy a case for my new laptop...

I bought one of these. Don't judge, haters.

Some short-shorts...

And more lingerie. What can I say? I'm addicted.

I've never been poorer. Or happier.